Flat tax redux
Bruce Springsteen asked in "Radio Nowhere," the lead off song on Magic, his last album, if there was anybody still alive out there. I have a better question. Are there still any accountants still able to add (out there)?
You have to wonder how many times a politician who discovers, on the eve of nomination to high office - like being appointed Secretary of the Treasury or Health and Human Services Secretary - has to explain away some embarrassing tax problem with some variation of "my accountant messed up" before the obvious solution kicks in. That involves a vast simplification of the tax code.
Steve Forbes, the failed candidate for president back in 1996, clearly got it right. The answer is a flat tax.
A flat tax is so basic that even a former Senator (Tom Daschle) or a Federal Reserve Governor (Timothy Geithner) can probably get it.
You take all your income - salary, stocks, bonds - that part should be really easy because over the past few months there won't be much to count there - trust fund money, rental income - ANY KIND OF INCOME - then multiply that by a number. Ten percent? That sounds about right. Taxes are what we pay for civilization, someone once said. Civilization is worth at least 10 percent.
Presto - your tax liability magically appears, neat and simple.
Who knew that all along, those of us who sweated it out over our tax forms, worrying about all those deductions and itemizations we never really understood, but assuming we were somehow doomed to come out on the short end, were really the geniuses, at least when you compare yourselves to the accountants the big shots were able to hire. No matter how hard you try, apparently, there's always some annoying little Nannygate hand grenade threatening to go off, or some perk that you forgot to declare, like the use of a car, in Daschle's case.
You'd like to think it's just arrogance. If it's stupidity, we're in big trouble. These are, after all, the brain trusts we are pinning our hopes on to get us out of this unholy mess we're in.
I always liked the philosophy of a flat tax, because it treats all money the same. No more corporate loopholes and socialism for the wealthy. No more nonsensical deductions for the politically well-connected. Just a simple honest tithe to the government.
No more politicians squirming in the klieg lights trying to say it wasn't really their fault.
All we can hope is that the next time the IRS calls you on the phone and threatens to ruin your day with vague hints about an audit if you can't explain some discrepancy in your tax return, you'll have as much success with the line Geithner used to get off the hook during his confirmation hearings - that -Gasp! - he should have read the instructions more carefully.
The Wall Street Journal nailed it - "Millions of Americans have said the same thing during an audit, earning less forgiveness."
At least we won't have to worry about that anymore. If the guy who now runs the IRS can't figure out his taxes, why should we?
It's time for a flat tax - seriously.